Baby Names My Future Wife Will Probably Hate

Posted by Baddie on May 29, 2008 · Leave a Comment

Notice I used “probably” in the title instead of “surely”? Well that’s because there’s a slight chance that I’ll marry someone who will totally be OK with my brilliant ideas like pizza for breakfast everyday. Lots of crazy chicks running around these days.

A few days ago, a discussion was started on Twitter about baby names. I’d like to link to the relevant tweets, but I’m lazy. Yay me! Besides, you’d be lucky to read those tweets because Twitter’s being a douche these days. Anyway, that discussion reminded me of one baby name that I really loved ever since high school. “Scarlett”. I don’t know, there’s something about that name that evokes strength and femininity. But I stopped loving it when Scarlett Johansson became a prominent fixture in Hollywood. Just think about it. If I name my future daughter “Scarlett”, the first thing that will come to mind whenever I say her name is this:

scarlett johansson

That would be totally weird. So I’m thinking maybe it’s time I think of new baby names that I’ll try to give my future kids and will probably be rejected by my future wife who will totally be a pain in my future ass. Here’s what I came up with:

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